I have big dreams for my life and since I was diagnosed with MS, it's like I can hear a clock ticking each second of each day as it passes. Another day gone; time I can never get back. I've always been afraid of time. The present becomes a memory so quickly and we spend so much time wondering "what next?" and "I can't wait for..." that the present quickly becomes a blur rather than a moment we took full advantage of.Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.
For me, the whole "when I grow I want to be..." has become much more present tense and no longer wishful thinking. Right now, I want to be a community health advocate, a college graduate, I want my master's degree, I want to work for a high-profile PR agency, I want to be an entrepreneur, I want to be an author, I want to be a freelance writer, I want to sing, I want to travel and I want to live my life to the fullest. Right now. Everyday I wake up and think to myself, what can I do today that will get me closer to these plans? With that in mind, almost everything I do is purposeful.
Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.
Over the past year, I have been making strides to bring my entrepreneurial ambitions to life. My company, Footprint Social Media, will assist small businesses with social media branding through full-scale analysis, strategy, development and finally, consultation/implementation. With the website for my business set to launch this week and potential clients on the horizon, I'm getting closer and closer to this dream.
Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.
While this dream has been at the forefront of my mind for the past year, I have also been taking steps to accomplish other dreams. I have finished a novel that I began in high school and am hoping to get it reviewed, edited and hopefully published on an e-network within the next year. I have started applying for various internships and opportunities that have the ability to bring me closer to my dreams of working for a PR agency and becoming a freelance writer/blogger. After hearing this, so many people ask, "What's the rush?" Well, for me, the future is NOW.
Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.
Because of MS, so much is unknown when it comes to my health and what I'll look like in 10, 20, 30+ years. Will I be able to walk? Will I be able to talk? Will I be able to hug my family and friends? While I pray on this often and have been persistently taking my medication everyday, I can't help but wonder about the future and feel like I need to start preparing now. If my health and functioning does dramatically decline over the next few years, I want to have accomplished the goals I had set out to accomplish and not have wasted any valuable time. The clock is ticking and this is a race I do not plan to lose.
Jess... people are striving everyday to live a "purpose driven life," but you do so much more than "talk the talk." I pray that you stay encouraged. Remember tomorrow is not promised to anyone. You see perfectly healthy individuals, young and old, experience major life challenges or even worse, death. I've known you for all 21 years of your life and you have ALWAYS ALWAYS been driven, way before a MS... So if MS has made you value time and truly see the "POWER OF NOW," then it's another blessing from GOD! Stay strong and know that you are never alone!
ReplyDeleteJess, it's Ms D. Darryl and I stay in touch a bit and I talked to him last night. I told him how much I still miss all of you hanging out here. He sent me your blog link and I just want to say I feel blessed that he did. I hope you'll allow me the privilege of saying how proud of you I am. I'm not sure how to best express what else I am feeling right now. I have always loved that you were part of my family's world through Jim. What a leader, what a smile, and what a nice person! But now I read this and feel awe and so respectful of you. Emotions whirling so for the moment I'm just going to say Thank you.
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