Be Your Own Advocate

Ever seen someone go to court without a lawyer? Well, I watch a lot of Law and Order so I've seen it many times. The defendant walks into the courtroom with an arrogant swag, shoulders back and a flimsy folder (if that)...deciding they know and have everything they need to present a concise and well thought-out case, then as soon as the judge slams the gavel down everything falls apart. The defendant forgets what they were meaning to say, stumbles over their words and gets run over by the prosecutor. It's painful to watch.

That's why if you ever go to court, bring a lawyer. I'd also argue that if you ever go to the doctor, bring a lawyer. Or be as prepared as one.

Since I was diagnosed with MS, my view the the health care system has changed dramatically. In a day, I went from a friendly, seemingly all-knowing pediatrician to a much older, seemingly wiser, more hurried neurologist. After seeing him once, I was sent off on my own to give myself shots, pay close attention to my body and be truly independent. After he diagnosed me, the specialist literally told me "see you in six months!" Eight months later, it was my family who had to call to remind the office that we were supposed to be having a check-up. It was my dad who had to remind the doctor that we were supposed to be looking at the updated MRI results, while I was in this so-called check-up. It was my mom who had to repeatedly call the lab to get my test results to find out why this prescribed medication was not working anymore.

Two months later, it's me that's repeatedly calling the doctor's office, the drug company and anyone necessary to find out what the next step is. It's me that's getting on the nurses for forgetting to sign my prescription...two weeks ago. It's me that's having to carry around paper medical records in case a specialist or my school doesn't have access to them (...which is what my company handles :) ). It's me that's calling my doctor's offices to make sure my appointment still stands.

Right now, I'm reading "Eat, Pray, Love" (on my e-reader!) and in the book she speaks about how she always used to live her life passively. Even during her rough divorce, she decided to sit back and go with the flow, to avoid further conflict (her divorce ended up taking two years because of her attitude). She called herself going what she thought was the "Gandhi-route" or "Mandela-route." She laughs about this later because she points out that she didn't realize that both Gandhi and Nelson Mandela were lawyers, themselves. Point made: want to be a change-agent and make things better for yourself? Be your own lawyer.

Doctors and nurses should make us feel like we are their only patient. Like they have all the time in the world to spend with us and tell us about what's going on. But unfortunately, they don't. It's up to us to do the research, keep track of our bodies, take care of our bodies and be persistent about important appointments. Walk into that doctor's office like your own lawyer. I'm talking, a THICK notebook of your charts, your scans, notes taken on small changes you've noticed (whether mood-based, weight-based, etc.), research and case studies you want to address, dates for follow-up and a list of questions to not forget.

One thing I personally hate when I go to see the neurologist is small-talk and illegitimate counseling. My mom is a psychologist. Get to the point and tell me what's going on and what we need to do. I did not come for you to cry with me and talk about how hard things must be. This is about business.

I'm saying this to everyone, but most of all I'm saying it to myself. I've let doctors, parents and everyone else take care of me my whole life while I took a back, window seat. Now that I'm getting older, it's time I take charge of my health, because I've realized that if I don't become my own advocate/lawyer...no one will. Who knows where I would be if my family had never called to ask about a check-up in April. Who knows where I would be if I hadn't scolded the drug rep for 5 minutes today about follow-up. Who knows where I would be if my family and I followed their lead and weren't as aggressive?

You know what? I plan on never finding out where I would be. That said...

"ALL RISE! The court of Judge Jessica is now in session. You may remain standing until I say otherwise." -__-