Loving Your Letters

I play a lot of Words with Friends. And when I say "a lot," I mean I may have a small problem (Alec Baldwin status). But I love the game because it keeps my mind active and it teaches me a lot. In fact, in the hundreds of games I've played, I've actually been able to make some interesting comparisons between life and the game. Just hear me out.

For those of you not familiar with Words with Friends, it's basically like Scrabble that you can play remotely. I'd like to think that I'm a beast, but I've definitely had some weak moments. People often complain that I play too strategically or too slowly, which I can definitely admit. There will be times when I'm staring at my letters for hours, trying to figure where they'd best be placed. While imagining the words I could create and points I could score, I notice myself focusing more on what I don't have than what I do have.

If only I had a "G." If only this area of the board wasn't already occupied. If only I had another vowel. If only, if only. If only I could focus on what I do have rather than agonizing over what I don't have, I could probably move forward.


Gratitude is at the forefront of my mind in 2012 - appreciating what I have and not focusing on what I don't. I've had some majors losses during my college career but they don't compare to the wins I've experienced. By focusing on the right things, I think we can all move forward and make the best of our circumstances despite what we're lacking. Marinate on that.

--> purelyjess. I welcome all challengers :)

Getting Focused Against the Odds

It's easy to accomplish things when you feel like it - but when you do something even when you don't want to is when true growth and self-discipline happens.

My main focus this year was to build up my own self-discipline. Yesterday, the stars didn't align for me. Three days into the new year and I was already losing my grip on doing what I needed to do. I overslept, got distracted by Twitter and Tabatha's Salon Takeover, and before you know it it was 4 p.m. and I had lost most of my time to be productive. But in every failure there's definitely a lesson. Here are some lessons I learned that will help me to stay focused throughout the year:

Anticipate your 'down days:' When observing yourself, note the days where your productivity lags. Is it when you wake up late? Is it on Tuesdays and Thursdays when there's less on your schedule? Is it on Monday when you're overwhelmed? If you can anticipate the days when you'll be struggling to accomplish what you need to, then you can better equip yourself to meet them head-on. 

For me, I always start strong on Sunday and Monday, when my motivation and inspiration is at its highest. By Tuesday, I've slowed down. By Wednesday, I'm lagging and have lost most of my steam. By Thursday, I'm honestly pretty useless. If I know that about myself, I can better equip myself to deal with and overcome it.

Set a time limit. Sometimes we need a little bit of distraction to get focused. Give yourself a few minutes or hours of what you want with a clear plan to get back on track afterward. If what you need to do is time sensitive, promise yourself that you'll come back to it as soon as  you finish. Sometimes a small dose of a television show or computer game is exactly what the doctor ordered to get your mind back on track.

Don't beat yourself up. Everybody deals with focus issues every now and then. Just because you're unfocused doesn't mean that you've failed at achieving the goals you've set out to accomplish. Accept the fact that you're a little off today, embrace it, pray about it, then let it go. We're not superhuman.

After a few hours of Tabatha yesterday, I was able to turn the television off, relocate and do what I needed to do before I went to sleep. Hopefully these takeaways will help you the next time you find yourself to be lacking in focus or motivation.

What are ways that you access focus when focus isn't in your favor?

The Micro-Action Movement.

It's only January 2nd and I'm already on a roll with no intent of slowing down. My first 40 days of my "New Year's Results" is in full force (not eating out more than once-a-week), and I've also gotten back on track with my novel which I was initially intending to have finished by May, but with a new micro-action goal of 4,000 words-a-day, I am on track to finish this baby by January 15th (right before my classes start). I started three new graduate school applications yesterday that I am also aiming to have finished by the first week of school, so I am PUMPED, to say the least.


I read a blog post yesterday that really helped me to understand how I'm going to attack these results without giving up the way so many people do early in the year. The blog talked about the concept of micro-action. When we make a big resolution, such as to lose weight, write a book, change our diet or better manage our money, it sounds more than doable in the heat of the moment, but when it comes time to actually face the reality of accomplishing these things, we become daunted by the reality of them and what it's actually going to require of us to make it happen; that's how people give up so quickly. I mean, let's be real. Will you really go to the gym every morning at 6 a.m. to jog on the treadmill for an hour? Maybe for a month while you're still motivated. Personally, I know the gym at school is only crowded for the first three weeks, if that.


The blog I read stressed micro-action: doing something small and realistic to contribute to the greater, long-term picture. Planning to run a marathon by October? When you think about it, it's daunting to actually get up every morning and run to train when you've never run before. Start by committing yourself to power walking three times-a-week, then later graduating to jogging, that way you're less likely to quit because you're committing to actions that are actually manageable. The next thing you know you'll be in New York finishing that marathon and wondering how you actually did it. 


For me, finishing and publishing my novel has been a task that's been on my list every year, but when it comes down to sitting down to actually write 60,000 - 80,000 words, I get intimidated and distracted by my own thoughts. Questions like "Who are you to write a novel?"  "What makes you think anybody would read this?" cross my mind and distract me from the task at hand too easily. That's why I'm committing to micro-action. Spending two hours to write 4,000 words-a-day instead of trying to sit down and write a novel all at once is much easier on my state of mind. Restricting my weekly fast food intake and money output by designating only one day a week when I can indulge at a restaurant is another way I'm micro-acting. Another way is by jump roping for five minutes each day before really getting out on the streets to jog again.


Be real with yourself in 2012 and your resolutions are sure to become results. Check out the blog and let me know what you think! If we focus on the little things, I'm sure that the big results we want will materialize. What are some of your resolutions that you can micro-act on?